Divorce is never an easy topic to think about. People may hesitate or even put off going through with a divorce for many reasons. Some feel their marriage has resolvable issues, while others may simply fear the unknown of disentangling their life from their spouse’s. For as many reasons as there are to get a divorce, there may be an equal number of reasons to hold on.
7 Common Signs Divorce Might Be Right for You
You may have come across this article because you’re wondering if divorce is right for you. Whether you’re just started to explore this topic or have been doing so for a while, you’re probably trying to ascertain if it’s time to take action. Although only you can make the decision to act in your unique situation, we offer a few common signs that divorce might be right for you.
1. Communication Breakdown
Communication plays an important role in any marriage. Spouses’ ability to tell each other how they’re feeling and work out solutions to disagreements is key. Although no relationship will have “perfect” communication, a lack or breakdown of communication between spouses is problematic when it breeds contempt and other uncomfortable feelings.
If you’ve answered “yes” to any of the following questions, your marriage might have communication problems:
- Do you feel like you can’t tell your spouse how you really feel?
- Does it seem like your spouse is hiding how they really feel?
- Do small misunderstandings lead to large fights?
- Is conflict avoided to keep the peace?
- Does it seem like you and your spouse are unable to communicate like you did before?
Communication skills can be learned through therapy, but if that hasn’t worked or your spouse is unwilling to work on communication problems, other aspects of your marriage might suffer. When left unaddressed for long enough, divorce might seem like the natural choice to seek happiness.
2. You & Your Spouse Disagree About Money
Financial issues in a marriage often lay close to the root of divorce. When spouses are unable to agree on how to make, spend, and save money, these disagreements can lead to significant problems in the future.
If one spouse insists the other doesn’t work, or one spouse refuses to work, it can put a lot of additional strain on the situation. If one spouse is comfortable spending large amounts of money when the other isn’t, contempt between them can breed.
Making matters more complicated, any different opinions about money are amplified when the marriage is experiencing financial hardship, which can accelerate a couple on the path to divorce.
3. You & Your Spouse Disagree About Children
Significant disagreements about children can also lead to divorce. Specifically, disagreements about how to raise children or whether or not to have them at all can dissolve a marriage.
Although people’s opinions on children can certainly change over time, that change can still cause a divorce if the disagreement between spouses is strong enough.
4. You Don’t Feel Your Partner Respects You
Everyone should always feel like their spouse respects them. If you don’t feel like your spouse has respect for you, your opinions, your interests, or anything else that’s important to you, you might want to consider exiting the marriage. This is another scenario where therapy can help, but if it doesn’t, divorce might be inevitable to regain happiness.
5. Your Marriage Lacks Intimacy
It’s a common trope that things in the bedroom “cool down” a bit after getting married, but marriage shouldn’t mean the end of intimacy. Whether physical or emotional, intimacy between spouses must be maintained over time. If it isn’t, one or both spouses may feel neglected by the other, which can cause many other issues.
Communication can help cure concerns about a lack of intimacy, but if the communication between spouses also suffers, there may be much more significant concerns about the stability of the marriage.
6. The Relationship Isn’t a Priority
No one should take their relationship with their spouse for granted, but it can be easy to do so when life gets complicated. Between work, managing your children’s lives, and finding time for yourself, you might find it hard to find enough time for your spouse.
While this is just life, for the most part, a disinterest in making time for your spouse – or their disinterest in making time for you – can signal a fracture in the marriage that can lead to divorce. As with any of these issues, communication can help alleviate tension and correct problems.
In many cases, however, a failure to make the relationship a priority can be a sign that more significant issues with a marriage lay beneath the surface.
7. You & Your Spouse Don’t Argue
This might seem like an odd sign of divorce at first, but arguments between spouses don’t always have to be bad. In fact, the occasional argument between spouses can be a sign of a healthy marriage because it can imply that spouses care about the outcome of a decision. When spouses argue in good faith, they aren’t fighting each other, they’re fighting for each other. They care about how it’ll affect themselves, their marriage, and their family.
When spouses are unwilling to argue about topics that can have such an impact, it can be a sign that they might not care as much about how the outcome can hurt them. Apathy about the outcome of an important decision can also be a sign of apathy toward the marriage. Keeping the peace can sometimes mean one or both spouses are suffering in silence, when an argument (conducted respectfully and free of violence and abuse) could otherwise help the couple reach a resolution.
Do You Need Legal Assistance?
If you are thinking about divorce, Moyer Law, PC can be there to help you. As a full-service divorce firm, our attorneys have the experience and skill necessary to support your interests throughout the entire divorce process.
We offer our clients personalized and professional legal service. You, your situation, and your goals are what inform the legal solutions and strategies we build for you. As dedicated advocates for many who have undergone the divorce process, rest assured that you’ll be treated with the attention and respect you deserve during this difficult time.
To learn more about our legal assistance, contact Moyer Law, PC online today.